It’s like flying into turbulence, coming out of it, and turning back to see what that was all about, but finding nothing. Nothing has changed, really. Nothing except the heart, maybe.
Doing a track like「Berbunga」needs both your left-brain and right-brain. You need to be creative; a right-brain issue i supposed. But you'll need the left-brain too, which is about organising. You need that Mozart element in all musicians to power your brain like a Logic Studio Pro™ software, or a least something a GarageBand™ if all else fails...
I realised I missed work. Not the 9-5 sort of work that I have resigned from ever since I reset my musical life, that’s for sure. It’s just that: there’s something nerdily attractive about enjoying the art coming to life when the audience are not looking. It’s a personal thing that only the creator or practitioner can know as he/she engages 1 on 1 with the song, script or screen. It’s the heart of the performer in the height of practice and the composer, at the heart of creation.
It may not be the coolest thing on a Friday night, but it’s the window to the world below the stage for the songwriter who wants her or his voice to heard. There are so many psychological barriers to this. I wonder if bankers, lawyers and politicians understand it. But then, I may not be fair to them if I claim to understand what they have to endure everyday too.